Wednesday, October 20, 2010

RSVP etiquette

Reader beware, rant ahead.

As one who hosts lots of events throughout the year, as well as attends, I rely heavily on Evites. They are, in my opinion, the easiest way to get word out about a party and get a head count of how many will be attending. They make it so easy to RSVP. Let me repeat:


If you are reading this blog, chances are you had to CLICK on SOMETHING to get here, whether the actual link, or in your reader, or whatever. Based on the logic that you can click, there is no reason on God’s green Earth why you should read an Evite and not reply. NO REASON. NO REASON!!! I know for a fact they send out a reminder email a few days before the event to remind you. Do it then. Just do it.

If someone is going through the trouble to host an event and thought enough of you to be invited, the least you can do is return the courtesy and indicate whether or not you will be able to make it. You don’t know if you’ll be able to? Guess what? THERE IS A “MAYBE” OPTION!!

It’s the same repeat offenders, too. Drives me up the wall. Almost to the point where I want to stop inviting them to things altogether. And then there’s the people who don’t even READ the Evite. Yes, the sender of the Evite sees all. Who looked at it and when. So don’t think you’re hiding. You’re not. Do you just see the invitation in your inbox and decided, “Nah, I don’t like parties, I won’t even read it.” Am I the only who gets excited to see Evites? Woo! Party! And I’m invited! Sweet!

I’m in the process of throwing a baby shower with my good friend Linda for our good friend Jessica. We opted to do printed invitations, and I can already tell it’s going to be hell trying to figure out who is coming. So please, if you get an invite, RSVP to one of us. Email, call, text, facebook, whatever. Just throw us a freaking bone.

I’m a planner, so knowing something important such as, oh, HOW MANY PEOPLE TO FEED, is something I need to know. If you don’t RSVP and show up, don’t expect there to be anything for you to eat, or for you to sit. If you say you’re coming and you don’t, well then I probably just wasted my money and my time planning for you to be there.

I understand things come up, emergencies happen, kids get sick. But that’s no excuse for you to forget manners and be rude. If I invite you to something, we’re probably friends, and we probably communicate on a semi-regular basis. All it takes is a text. Really.

And to my Relief Society friends. I know a lot of planning goes on behind the scenes for activities. I’m not one of those planning gals, but I’ve been there and I know how much appreciated a response it. Whether it’s for a dinner, a trip, anything.

I can probably talk about this until I’m blue in the face and it still won’t phase some people. Until they are the ones sending the invitations and awaiting the response, they will never change.

Please tell me I’m not the only one who feels this way!


J.R.G. said...

Karen, I regret to inform you that I will not be able to make it to your place this year for Thanksgiving dinner.

Lara said...

Honey, if there was a dollar given for everyone who feels this way, it would take a sizeable chunk out of the National Deficit.

That's why I always put phone and EMAIL for rsvps--because people don't like to talk on the phone any more. They text or email, because our society is becoming more and more closed off. Sad but true. I hope you get more RSVPs!

vanessa said...

I know what you mean. It really perplexes me that some people don't follow up on things. Sometimes an email gets forgotten in the mix, yes, but the reminder should solve that! :)

Yours, Mine, &, Crazy Daisy said...

Oh SNAP! I am so grateful I RSVP-ed ASAP on that Evite!

As a member of our RS event committee for several years, I know you speak the truth. I feel so bad when we solicit food donations for a large number of guests and then so many people don't show and it all goes back home with the kind woman who was kind enough to donate.

Uh oh...I think I have a Evite in my inbox left unread...

Abraham + Marci said...

I totally understand! I am having a halloween party on Sat and just had to text everyone that I had not heard from to find out if they are coming. I will have to look into Evite!

Suzi said...

I totally agree!

Mom R. said...

chill out Karen, cheez, if you make enough for all invited and they don't come then everyone has more or you have leftovers for lunch or dinner the next nite. Be grateful for who does show up. Life is hard without you stressing about a simple thing as a party. "Better to have and not need it than not enough and not have it."

gena said...

Guilty. However, I received your Evite 4 days before the party & never got a reminder email. :(

Melissa said...

I LoVe your honesty! You just said everything I have been thinking. Thank you.

Courtney said...

I TOTALLY agree. However, I have many family members who do not get the concept and I just end up calling them in the end. So much extra work for something so easy. I am a planner 100% which is why when I asked for a half day from work a month in advance for my niece's b-day party and they changed the location AND time two days before I was very upset (who does that?) because my request off wouldn't work for their new time and I missed the entire thing. P.S. That family member did not care one bit that she changed all the plans last minute. I just learned everyone is so different and people never change so don't even try to change them or expect a "sorry." Now we just don't go out of our way to meet their "plans." Ahhh, it is so nice to have friends who are planners, thanks for being one of them :)